This Floating Excrement Was Far Too Meaningful! These Are the Television Disappointments of the Year.

Looking back, we reflect on the TV landscape of the past year, a handful of series stand out not for their brilliance, but for their spectacular failures. From cringe-inducing spin-offs to confusingly bad docuseries, here are the productions that left us utterly bewildered or simply reaching for the remote.

And Just Like That

How to start with this divisive spin-off? Burdened with woeful writing, painful arcs (we demand better for Miranda!), and a mere 71 seconds of beloved Samantha, the show fought to justify its existence. Briefly, as the final season began, it seemed as if it had at last found its groove. Then came an episode all about Seema’s natural deodorant. No wonder the creator announced this would be the final series. It ended on a low point; the closeup of Miranda’s toilet flooded with poo was simply too symbolic. Yet, viewers certainly found joy picking apart every single “wtf?” episode. And as Carrie – once again single – twirled around her palatial townhouse to Barry White, who couldn't release a little sob?

All’s Fair

‘Is Kim Kardashian an actress? The answer is a resounding no.’

But that was practically the least of this drama's problems. The subject of a very rare zero star assessment, it was hard to know where to begin enumerating the flaws. The hilariously leaden writing? The tedious glorification of affluence and materialism? The seemingly wilful parade of tropes? Acting so poor they felt almost malicious? Let’s just say “each and every one” and never speak of this show again. Except, a new season has been commissioned, so we’re likely going to have to.

AKA Charlie Sheen

Given the legal troubles, abuse claims and fatherly shortcomings, it’s fair to say Charlie Sheen has been a bad boy. Not that you’d truly have known it from this multi-part documentary which chuckled along at Sheen’s various bouts of self-destructive hedonism while failing to tell us anything we didn’t already know. Rather, it felt as if this loose cannon was being pandered to, so any pity this show might induce should be reserved for the people who have had to endure proximity with this charismatic but dismissive narcissist.

The Supercomputer Drama

Naturally we knew it was preposterous from the outset: a drama about a AI known as Charlie Big Potatoes that could either save the world – or annihilate all of humanity. We persevered out of sheer admiration for its stars … but by the end, it felt like even they had given up trying. One barely cared when his character died, and the other ended up hacking Charlie with an axe … in super slow-motion. Talk about giving up the ghost.

The Gangster Drama

Dodgy figures meeting in deserted boxing gyms? The Prodigy’s Firestarter jackhammering away in club scenes? The late 90s called and demands its gangland drama back.

In truth, that is unfair on the gangland dramas of the late 90s. Many seem a bit old-fashioned now, but at least they didn’t suffer the embarrassment of having to accommodate unconvincing accents. But there were many other issues. Mainly that it was just profoundly boring; a dispute over narcotics territory between various London rogues which felt rather simplistic.

With Love, Meghan

Considering the degree to which she grinds the gears of the nation’s performatively angry commentators, it’s temptingly tempting to applaud the Duchess of Sussex’s various forays into quaint homemaking as intentional provocations. But then you watch them and are compelled to concede that actually, they might have a point. It’s like watching a lifestyle magazine animated; a poster for evening drinks with delusions of grandeur; a procession of snoozing dogs, buzzing beehives, Hallmark sayings and forgettable crafting “hacks” you’ll not remember instantly. All underpinned by vast, largely undeserved wealth. Ugh.

The Beckham Documentary

There are clearly interesting things to be said about regarding Victoria Beckham and her struggles with vocation, self-image, self-acceptance. But for whatever reason, this three-part series opted not to say them. Instead, the viewing was akin to consuming a sales brochure. She obviously has every right to bridle at what she describes as her “stern” image. But sadly, she failed to do herself any helps with this guarded letdown of a series.

The Inheritance

It had the potential to be the next big hit – except even more extravagant, with a glamorous star playing dead and a sharp-tongued personality managing her inheritance. What more could you ask for? As contestants battled it out, there was plenty of betrayal and squabbling. But the rules quickly became incomprehensible: it’s still too complicated to detail what precisely was happening. Even more disappointingly, we only saw glimpses of the star via filmed videos. The show ended up smelling of a production that was straining desperately to live up to something far greater than it.

The Lena Dunham Romcom

How do you follow a show that defined a generation? The expectation was enormous for this glitzy romcom about Jessica, a rosy-eyed New Yorker who lands in London with a shattered romance. The lead actress took her biggest role by the horns and was a delight to watch, embodying Jane Austen levels of romantic notions. But it was all very glossy and, ironically, was not enough. Plus, the sheer amount of celebrity cameos involved felt uncomfortable.

The Sketch Show Return

Not good enough to be ‘uneven’.

Given the shrewd inclusion of talented emerging comics, hopes were high. But sadly, most of it fell flat. A recurring sketch was a single joke milked to a dry pulp but repeated in every episode. One star seemed too willing to slip into a well-known ranting mode. The behind-the-scenes sketches, meanwhile, simply provoked the idea that they should probably have stayed in there a while longer.

The Knox Dramatisation

This dramatisation of the story of Amanda Knox was executive produced by Amanda Knox and pretty much solely presented the viewpoint of Amanda Knox. So, while there probably is an interesting drama to be made about the horrific 2007 murder, this was not it. The subject matter needed to be handled with care. Instead, the series laboured awkwardly to find the right tone, lumbering from oddly breezy, somewhat mannered farce to inevitably, real-life horror. Complex? Arguably. A complete mess? Absolutely.

The Maths Genius Thriller

We love the lead actor … but did we believe him playing the most brilliant maths genius in history, a man so intelligent he’s on the verge of a breakthrough that could destabilise society? Nope! This international thriller about government agencies targeting – and eliminating – intellectuals honestly got more absurd by the second. Formulaic nonsense.

1000 Men and Me: The Bonnie Blue Story

This uncritical portrait followed the online personality notorious for sexual escapades as she prepared for her biggest feat yet. What on earth would possess her? What we wanted was way more interrogation of her true psychology, plus those of the men in the queue. They could at least have spoken to the legendary mum who showed up to drag her son out of the queue. What we got was disturbing imagery and zero critical analysis of her notoriety whatsoever. It's staggering to consider, the filmmaker has a young daughter too.